I think it is anyway... it may even be 3.0 or 4.0. I've lost count. No matter. That's quite sufficient downtime on this blog. So your house burnt down... so you got caught in a divorce... so you moved to a new house and flirted with bankruptcy. These are NOT valid excuses for letting your blog fall behind.

Anyway, in the last 2 months, I've driven over 5,000 miles. Home to Devon and back in the same day, then a few days later, I drove up to my ma's house in Wales, had a mug of tea and a bacon sandwich and then hightailed it across the north of England to Chesterfield for a wedding and then back again. Then a little while later I did the same trip to Devon and back again. Drinking and drugged up driving are illegal but I tell you, we should all be put away for driving on too little sleep. It's not good for your soul - and not good for anybody else on the road either.

To my profound horror, my mother revealed to me that she regularly reads my blog, so there goes at least half of my vocabulary but it might be a good time to mention the rather large tattoo on my arm that I never told her about. Telling her this on my blog is almost as bad as dumping somebody by text but somehow I feel justified. Human beings can convince themselves that is anything is accetable if you tell it to yourself often enough.

Also, my long lost sister got back in touch after 15 years. That's a long time but she also revealed she has been reading my blog too. So what have we learnt here? If you have a blog, you never have to speak to anybody, ever.

And that my friends, is enough for today but over the course of the week I will share such marvels with you that you won't be able to leave your seat (much like the Derren Brown experiment). Gasp as you share in the delight of the very large electric saw at work in B&Q; during the purchase of a £200 wendy house, bought for £35, that will make a great rabbit hutch. Hide behind the sofa as I show you mobile phone pictures of a man reading a book as he wanders the Tesco aisles aimlessly.

It's good to be back.

Currently reading: The Lost Symbol - don't be fooled by reviews desperate to find an opinion on it. It's a good solid thriller much like many others. Simply enjoy it for what it is and move along to the next one...
Currently listening to: Billion Dollar Babies - Alice Cooper.