The Minimalism Of Minimalism
I figured I’d best write the next instalment of my series on minimalism - and then I stopped… what am I? A fucking babysitter for people who can’t control their own impulses? A nu-age internet guru dishing out handy tips for people too busy to figure out how to live a life that's worth something?
No. That’s not what I built this place for and I have things to do, so:
Get rid of your shit: If you didn’t own it already, how much would you pay to have it in your life? There’s your answer to most of your problems.
Traveling light: If you want to take all your stuff around the world with you like a soon to be evicted hermit crab, knock yourself out. What the hell do I care. See you by the pool sucker.
Soul Ache: If you care more about inanimate objects than you do about people, your soul has gone the same way as Elvis - straight out of the stage door in search of a burger with fries. Don’t forget the cheese while you're looking for it.
My Advice: Once you stop worrying what others think about you, you’ll realise how little they do.
I don't think I left anything out.
Taken from The Unwritten. An even better graphic novel series than Sandman.
Ham Meet Rye. Rye, Meet Ham
There's nothing quite like a great literary tattoo to start the week with a bang. This Bukowski comes from the hand of a friend of a friend - Lea Nahon who you can find here in all her unfettered glory.
Lea is one of my personal top ten favourite artists in the world - proper feature type thing of many words coming your way in the next issue (#264) of the mag if you're looking for more. People can be quite vocal about Bukowski's right to be called 'literary', but you don't see many Thomas Hardy tattoos around, so I rest my case.
Out here in Lonely-Land, I'm just coming up to the end of a final draft of The Really Important Thing I've been working on these last few weeks. I'm pretty excited about it. It's some of the best work I've done - and I don't say that lightly. I'm my own harshest critic every single day of the week - and this is standing its ground on all fronts. I'll post updates when it gets where I think it's going and then... we wait.
It Just Doesn't Add Up
My small person has to sit her exams next summer. I sympathise a little but the sentence I hear more than any other on the subject is "But you don't understand how much harder it is than when you where in school." Given that I failed my maths exam at school and then flunked out on it the next four times I took it (making a grand total of five and totally proves I can add up), I've decided to share her pain.
She's struggling with maths too, so today I went out and bought one of those course syllabus text books to help out. And I don't understand any of it. Not even a little bit.
Then I thought: what if I taught myself GCSE maths from this very book and sat the exam at the same time - obviously not in the same room, she would die of embarrassment. I've already been warned in no uncertain terms over any inclination I might have about putting a band together. Anyway, I'm going to do it. How hard can it be if thousands of 16 year old kids can pass it with flying colours?
Very hard is the answer but there's only one way to find out for sure.
On the positive side, as a friend of mine in his forties who quit his job to go to university to learn how to be cameraman once said: "If I knew how little work everybody did, I would have just changed my work hours around, done two courses and still finished it in a year."
I've been toying around with a thing from the past today. Last weekend (or maybe it was the weekend before), I re-homed around 100 books. There are more books here already lined up which has left a nice hole in my psyche and the list of Things I Am In Charge Of.
Maybe there's room for a little something I once loved (but failed miserably to tend to properly) to come back in - and when I say 'a little something', I mean... small:
There's something about taking a Bonsai and looking after it properly that I find most attractive. The fact that I have never actually looked after one beyond round five months is another matter - and as much as a bad workman will blame his tools, what did I expect from a tree that cost £10 from the local DIY store? For the record, this one here is from a reputable dealer and is in good health to begin with. I think I'll find that might help a lot.
Finally - for I have things to do and was just killing time while my brain absorbed coffee here - if you're in the market for a new read and have chewed up/spat out everything I pointed at last week, you could do worse than hunt this down:
Personally speaking, I am not allowing myself to make this purchase until I have conquered a couple more shelves on the bookcase.
Which brings us to an interesting point if anybody was following my posts on minimalism:
Strictly speaking, I don't need any of these things but the math book is transient and useful, the tree is beautiful and the book looks like it will rock like a mother. Those things are very much allowed and need no justification at all.
If I am true to form, I will abandon the first, kill the second, devour the third and balance will be restored within a month.
Cars Hiss By My Window. Honest They do...
Over at The Flood Gallery, this Doors poster by Adam Pobiak has just gone up for sale and my plastic card is itching already. There are four variants in different limited runs and prices - hit the Flood link for the main page, you'll have to do your own detective work...
Meanwhile, in other services to popular culture, over at my buddy Brian Ewing's store, we have this slice of Iggy Pop action - also available in multiple variants. Same rules apply as above (so below):
Finally, being as we're on the subject of music, Zakk Wylde launched his own line of guitars this week - I believe his store is now officially open right here.
If nothing else, one of these in your house will make you want to learn to play pretty damn fast.
Thus ends the End Of Week Round Up Of Things To Get Rid Of Your Money On Pretty Fast.
Now, back to writing stuff...
A Word On Record Store Day
This coming Saturday (April 16th) is Record Store Day. For all intents and purposes, if you own a deck, you should be out supporting your local indie and helping them stay open in harsh times. The record stores themselves would be more than happy if you bought anything at all but it would be much cooler if you got yourself something good, don't you think?
Not that I'm an expert - though in reality, I beg to differ - if you need a hand, in no particular order here's some killer releases you should make an effort to get your hands on:
1: The Doors • Live at the Aquarius: The First Performance
A triple album no less! In a limited quantity of 5000, this Record Store Day version features the Doors' first night of a two night stand at the Aquarius Theatre on Sunset Boulevard in Hollywood, California.
2: Joan Jett and the Blackhearts • Sinner
Originally released in 2006, Sinner contains the original fourteen tracks, (on 150gram clear vinyl), includes a download card with the full album plus bonus enhanced footage including videos for A.C.D.C. and Androgynous as well as a pdf of lyrics (yeah, they should really stop doing this right - if you want to give us lyrics, put them on the freaking inside sleeve). Limited to 4000 copies. Great album regardless of the nonsense bagged up with it.
3: Cheap Trick • At Budokan
Back in April 1978, Cheap Trick capitalized on their wild popularity in Japan by performing and recording two shows at the Nippon Budokan located in the center of Tokyo in front of 12,000 screaming fans. In February 1979, the legendary 10-track Cheap Trick at Budokan was released and the album peaked at number 4 on the Billboard 200 becoming the band’s best-selling album with over 3 million copies sold. This 'Complete Concert’ edition features all of the 19 songs featured during those historical shows spread over two LPs. Simply awesome. Don't like Cheap Trick? You know nothing about rock n roll my friend. Limited to 5000 copies - dig it.
4: Chris Cornell • Euphoria Mourning
First released in September 1999 under the title ‘Euphoria Morning’ (with the missing ‘u’), this was Cornell’s first solo album and his only album released between the split of Soundgarden and the formation of Audioslave. In Cornell’s own words “The title of the record has been restored to its original spelling, which was changed before release after I listened to some bad advice.”
Featured on the album is first single, ‘Can’t Change Me’, which was nominated for Best Male Rock Vocal Performance at the 2000 GRAMMY Awards. ‘Flutter Girl’ was reportedly an outtake from Soundgarden’s 1994 album, Superunknown, while Cornell revealed later on during a 2007 solo tour that ‘Wave Goodbye’ was written as a tribute to Jeff Buckley, who drowned in Memphis in 1997.
One of my favourite albums of all time. Trust me on this.
5: Zakk Wylde • Book Of Shadows II
As fierce and diverse as his work in BLS and as large as his accomplishments as lead guitarist for Ozzy Osbourne have been, Book of Shadows II offers an even richer look into the spirit and psyche of one of the most beloved pillars of the hard rock community. Book Of Shadows II was just released this week - and if you think you know exactly what to expect based on that write-up, think again. Available at all the usual digital places if you're curious but on vinyl, this is rock at its best. Again... trust me on this.
Footnote: this means going to find a record store and not heading to the local supermarket because they have figured out there could be money in selling vinyl. Do the right thing.
•••
Interestingly, I was wondering why there wasn't also an indie bookstore day - but then I went to look and found that there is. They have a site here and I've never been quite so disappointed by anything in my life. Is that really it?
I guess it's OK if you want to buy books about cats, tea towels or a colouring book.. because GOD KNOWS THAT'S JUST WHAT WE NEED IN OUR BOOK STORES right?
Why hasn't somebody curated fifty books from around the world - classics and modern - and gotten some designers on the case? There are dozens of things the publishing world could have collectively pulled together to make it great but all I see is not very much at all to do with reading.
Just promotional crap.
Are we still seriously sitting around wondering why there are less indie bookstores left in the world than there are Bengal Tigers?
•••
Meanwhile, work still continues on Something Important which Needs To Be Done Soon - it's important to me anyway - so expect sporadic updates at best. I'll clue you in just as soon as I know more.
Not Dead...
Not dead - just working on Something Important which Needs To Be Done Soon.
Meanwhile, here's a neat minimalism poster for DareDevil to keep you amused.
The Purge - Prologue
I re-read what I had written in my first piece about minimalism on Saturday morning and decided to purge myself of around 100 books before the day was out. I know it will get harder as I get towards a sensible amount - but 100 were gathered and redistributed to a good home. I don't seem to have made much of a dent but it's a start.
They have gone somewhere other people can also read them and I guess some of them will become favourites, some will be passed further down the line and some will no doubt sit around doing not very much just like they did here but who knows what may happen when you let Paulo Coelho, Carlos Castaneda and Nick Kent out into the world together...
On the writing front, earlier this week I figured I should be submitting my work to literary magazines instead of - or as well as - stockpiling them here for publishing my own collections, I took to scouting around online for likely suspects and found this poster for the 2016 Raymond Carver Short Story Contest:
You can hit the poster image for more details on the comp. I post it here mostly because I love Raymond Carver and I need no other reason than that but it did lead me to think that maybe I should contribute a little more to the writing community by posting other such things here. It's tough out there. File under pending.
Meantime, on Thursday this week - April 7 if you're lost in space - the man I consider to be the greatest thriller writer on the face of this planet right now (and for some years), unleashes A Time Of Torment:
Which means I need to carve out a huge chunk of space to chew it up. I know it's not necessary to chew up a book like somebody might take it off you at any given moment but Mr Connolly is my exception to the rule.
Rather coincidentally, I find myself acting as a taxi driver for small person and friend on that very evening. It's Five Second Of Summer at the O2 - but you all knew that already right?
This is the first time I haven't bought myself a ticket to accompany her to such a thing - actually reads: "Do you have to come with us?" - so I figured I would find a corner somewhere that sells coffee and do some work, but now I have a much better idea. I'll share my corner and my coffee with Charlie Parker and hope that 5SOS over-run.
(Thank you J.C. - your timing this year is very much appreciated. If One Direction get back together next year, I'll mail you tour dates and maybe we could figure something similar out.)
Footnote:
If you're unfamiliar with Charlie Parker - and yep, I say this every year - go back and start at the beginning with Every Dead Thing. This is known as Time Not Wasted. If you're already with me on this, you can read the first chapter of A Time Of Torment right here.
Footnote 2:
Charlie Parker does not feature as part of The Purge. Some things need to stay where they are for obvious reasons.
Two Stones
(A slight interruption here if you were expecting more on minimalism - back soon with that)
In the garden, there's a big fir tree and in the big fir tree (sounds like a song from the Whicker Man) every morning without fail, a Magpie - sometimes two - will come and sit and shout down from their branch at Hector, who invariably seems to quite enjoy shouting up at them. It's become 'A Thing' but over the last two days, something odd has happened.
They've begun to leave me presents because I've been leaving stuff lying around for them to make a nest with - either that or they are enjoying the apples left lying on the ground for the rabbits.
I didn't think very much of it on the first day. On the first day, it was just a perfectly shaped stone dropped in a very obvious place. So perfect was the stone, I picked it up, took it inside and left it on the counter next to the radio.
Yesterday, I went outside to find another stone - pretty much exactly the same as the first one - left in the same place. Here:
There's plenty of stories about Crows and Ravens doing this, but none about Magpies - the only stories I can find are about how Magpies recognise your face, know where you live and will dive-bomb you for life if they are so inclined.
Maybe it is Crows. There's a lot of them around, I've just never seen them in the tree. That said, there is also a gang of five Jackdaws that hang around the shed.
The game continues.
The Art Of Minimalism (2)
Minimalism On The Road
One of the best aspects of having a minimalist mindset is how it can sometimes challenge you in ways you never imagined - and there's nothing quite like being away from home to force you to think about what you really need in your life.
Inside my head, I knew it was possible to go away for a few days and take only what would fit in my pockets - minimalism in the extreme if you will - but actually committing to it was a whole different ballgame.
The first thing to realise is, unless you're going to Borneo (or similar), most countries have these little buildings - sometimes big buildings - called shops. There's a whole wealth of goodies that can be found in there. Toothpaste, shampoo, toothbrushes - you name it, they probably stock it. It really is amazing.
Seriously, why pack a bag full of security nightmares when you could simply buy it when you get where you're going and ditch it before you come home? So far, this train of thought has not let me down - and believe me, I understand how hair can be a difficult beast more than most, but I've never fallen down a manhole by doing this. I'm not talking medicines and very specific personal items but people really are catered for in other countries as well as we are here. It might be stating the obvious, but you would be surprised at how the idea of this fills some people with disgust at being parted from what they're comfortable with.
It's a big thing out of the way when you don't have to think about that little bag of stuff though.
Clothes can be a pig of a thing to figure out but after a few trial runs, I finally mastered it. When I first went out into the world with nothing, I was in Milan for four days during November (just to give you an idea of what I was up against). One pair of jeans is enough. It really is. Unless you're one of those people who can't keep their food in their mouth or can't resist climbing over rusty fences into muddy cemetaries, it's enough.
One pair of shoes/boots is also enough. Maybe it depends what kind of a trip you're on. If it's business and changes of clothes are important to achieve said business, a bag may be totally necessary, but for wandering around pretending to be lost, no.
T-shirt, shirt, leather jacket. That's the top half. On arrival, t-shirt comes off, shirt back on. If it needs washing for aforementioned food crimes, wash it. Better still - ditch it. Those shops I mentioned, they also sell things like that too. The idea is not to be uncomfortable or dirty - the idea is freedom and if you get a new t-shirt into the bargain, great. So far as I can tell, one black t-shirt bought at home is pretty much the same as a black t-shirt bought away.
I thought the bottom half would be a little more problematic but it's not really. Socks and pants can also be found in our new favourite place. Buy new stuff - ditch the old - then you get to go home with windswept and interesting smalls.
I had built this up to be a big deal before I actually went for it, but going out to find toothpaste and socks is also a good chance to scout the area around wherever you're staying. You get good at it. It doesn't take longer than half an hour but it was only the half hour you would have spent standing around at the luggage carousel - and it's not the end of the world if you decide to do it later either.
It's called freedom.
It's worth pointing out here that the jacket is a key part of this kit. Leather is fantastic. It's warm when it needs to be and won't kill you to death when it's hot. The jacket I have has a whole bunch of pockets but you'd look a fool if you stuffed them with clothes, so keep it essential and flat. I also found a great pair of jeans from Crosshatch with pockets coming out of their ears. Not a ridiculous amount - I do have dignity - but enough to be helpful. You simply need to figure out a way to make what you do take with you work like a Shire Horse.
So my bare essentials list looked like this:
1. Passport - you can't get out of this one
2. iPhone, earbuds, charger cable and plug - sometimes, technology rocks
3. A book - that I left in the room when it was finished, but the habit of reading an ebook on your phone is likely a good skill to foster
4. Cash - another one you can't get out of unless you live by The Card
Pretty slimmed down if I say so myself.
For longer trips, it's still possible to travel light as a feather. Back when I had a week in the mountains of Colorado on the horizon, I figured I might have to take more. This is when I was inexperienced but I still got away with a couple of shirts and a change of underwear - but even in the wilderness of America, you can find both things at the airport on the other side and even locally.
Who knew people who live in the wilderness also need pants and shirts!
But take a bag I did. My trusted Overlander from Scaramanga - the only bag I own (and ever will):
I can't even recall what was in it now. I probably used the clothes I had packed and frivolously took a couple of books and a notebook too - all of which have since been ditched for reading and working digitally on the phone - unless I have a book I really want to finish. What's the point in having the equivalent of a small computer in your pocket if you're not going to push it to the max when you want to travel light?
Digitally speaking, there are worse things to do than take photos of your passport and stash them securely on the cloud... and I can't remember the last time I printed off a boarding pass or checked in at the airport. A smartphone can really be your best friend out in the world. If you lose it, you're screwed but then, if you lost your passport and cash, you'd be screwed too. With minimalism, it's not like you have to look after much while you're away, so look after this.
If you need something to keep money and cards in, I use this Bellroy Card Sleeve. Two cards, driving licence and a fistful of folded notes and it's still flatter than four Dairylea cheese slices stacked on top of each other. A genius piece of material engineering if ever I saw one:
(Maybe I should add this to my list of possessions from the previous post. Hmm.)
I don't think I left anything important out. Honestly, if you're going to take everything you have at home with you, what's the point in going anywhere? Get with the programme and see where it takes you.
Next: Minimalism In The Head
•••
“Stuff your eyes with wonder, live as if you’d drop dead in ten seconds. See the world. It’s more fantastic than any dream made or paid for in factories.” – Ray Bradbury
The Art Of Minimalism (1)
To make a change around here (and to focus myself), I thought I'd create a series of articles on minimalism and why it works for me... and maybe how it can work for some of you too. I'm not going to get all evangelistical on your ass but you know... if you can eek something out of it that's worth a damn, something positive has been achieved don't you think?
There's lots of information out in the online world about minimalism - it appears to be A Thing at the moment - then again, since the internet got switched on, everything is A Thing, right?
Minimalism isn't something you can pick up and put down - it's a way of life. A way of life that, if you do it thoughtfully, affords you so much freedom in the world, you'll wonder what hit you and why you didn't shrug off the junk earlier.
Minimalism started burrowing its way into my head about 13 years ago - before it had a 'name'. Life was so busy with kids, a job, money grief (you get the picture), I simply needed to turn the volume down. I read an article about some guy who was desperately trying to get his possessions down to 100 things, or maybe it was 50 - either way, it seemed an awful lot of stuff... I didn't even own that much at the time. So I came up with an arbitrary number (which was 12) and went for it - not by starting at the bottom with what I didn't need or want in my life, but at the top with what I did want. Some of those were practical, some were necessities and some really did make me happy. I don't even recall what was on that list anymore - that's how much 'the stuff' meant, but fast forward to today and my list of twelve items is still pretty solid.
Based on one of the most useful quotes of all time: "Don't have anything in your life that's not useful or you don't find beautiful", in no particular order, it currently looks like this:
1. Hector
2. 12 string guitar
3. MacBook/iPhone - does this count as one or two things? I could probably live without one of them if I had to
4. Car - because there's no point in freedom if you can't go anywhere
5. A pen - it matters more than you think
6. A suit - because sometimes you just have to
7. An internet/digital radio - a gift that I use more than I thought I would
8. Record player - plus some carefully curated vinyl
9. Bike - mountain variety
10. A big wooden chest - this is not full to the brim but currently holds things like: a box of photographs from when I was a kid that I can't decide what to do with and notebooks I use for writing. It's a work in progress.
11. A sword - recreational purposes
12. A bag - for travelling from Scaramanga (more on this in the next post)
and maybe: 13. A Japanese Maple - not sure if this counts. I like to think I'm just looking after it for the world
I also own some great art. Not much but listing it all down here, I see I obviously have more than 12 things, so let me go count...
•••
There are three great pieces of art now I count them and I think I can live with myself over that. My sins are not so great if I hit fifteen items of value in the world.
•••
Anyway, as you'll see, this list doesn't include one towel, one fork, one plate - that would be ridiculous. I have a family, a dog, a job... (notably things I want in my life) and they don't necessarily share my point of view. I simply wanted to be free from being trapped in a weird consumer culture that I never asked to be part of.
Time is precious - why spend it with people you don't want to or doing things you don't want to do? Best to spend it with the people you care about and on the stuff that's important... surely?
My downfall with minimalism is books. Despite a few purges over recent years, I still have far too many but I'm working on it. It's not something I wander around the house worrying about every day, but I know it needs doing - based mostly on the fact that I never read anything twice and therefore 99% of these books that surround me are thus rendered pointless.
Are they even books if they're not being read?
I'm going to figure this out by the end of the summer but my point here is to illustrate how easy it is to tie yourself to things. Maybe 'they show the world who I am' but that's an old version of me thinking. They don't really. Nobody comes round and nobody in the house ever marvels over my great collection of books, so who am I showing who I am to? The answer is probably myself, but like I said it's old thinking and it's hard to get out of.
I don't want to be defined by the things I bought. I want to be defined by what I do.
On the plus side, knowing I'm lying to myself is priceless.
But there's nothing in my list of possessions that doesn't contribute to either: doing what I want to do, participating in the things I love or taking care of the things I want to take care of. Basically, minimalism has allowed me to focus on the things that are important because I'm not distracted by the things that aren't.
The killing blow in all of this is that when you do it in the physical world, it echoes inside your head too. You get to be very good at habitually turning down the volume of the world when it gets too loud. I don't listen or watch the news (large scale events filter out regardless), I don't watch TV I don't want to watch just because it's on, I don't read a book to the end just because I started it if it's dull, I don't stay anywhere that doesn't inspire me... the list is long, but not endless - it's all achievable and the end result can be nothing less than a life lived on your own terms.
If you're game to throw in your all, give it a whirl. Make a list of the things you really want to keep around you and get the rest the hell out of your life. Then do it again... and again... and again until the exercise is painfully difficult on the grounds that there's not a lot left to make a list about.
Believe it or not, figuring out what to do with your possessions/junk is the easy part.
Questions welcome. Answers available. Maybe.
I'll leave you with this. I think it says just about all there is to say.
Next: Minimalism On The Road.
•••
"It's one thing not to live your own life
but another entirely not to die your own death"
Places I'd Like To Sit And Write One Day
This looks like a fine place to hide away for a couple of days and conjure up something about trees that go bump in the night or fish that creep in looking for snacks...
Thieves In The Temple
I've been in Warsaw for the last few days. A little part of me says it would be good to blog about my discoveries here but the larger part of me is much pleased that it's another big city under the belt for a chapter of Cities Of The Dead, so umm... too bad.
That makes six cities (I think): Milan, Paris, Brussels, Florence, New York, Copenhagen and Warsaw. That's seven... perhaps it's time to collate the work so far and throw out a pocket book sized volume. I'll look at that tomorrow I see how it shapes up. It's about time I put something new into the world.
Just before I headed out to Warsaw, I started taking the bookshelves apart looking for a travelling companion and found The Rotters Club by Jonathan Coe. It's been on the shelf for a long time and I've never read it. I hate the title (it makes me think of horse racing - go figure) and for some reason it had lodged itself in there as a book that wasn't up my street at all. Which begged the question: why is the damn thing still here?
I read the inside flap again and it sounded OK. The copy I have is a nice edition too - it's part of the Penguin range whereby they got some cool tattoo artists to redesign book covers. I opened it up, read a couple of pages, read a couple more pages... and pretty soon, I had read a whole lot of pages because it's Really Quite Good. Go figure!
So now I'm just pissed at myself for not reading it sooner, but I am looking forward to sitting around in various plastic chairs in Europe and getting stuck in.
And now I must return to DareDevil on Netflix... because surely, surely, that's what you are all doing too. More later... aside from DD, things to do... books to build.
Nonstop To Nowhere
It's been a good day at the coal face. I had to get up early because it was small persons birthday. At 15, I'm not sure how much longer I'll be able to keep calling her that but I guess she'll always be a small person to me. Off she went to school as normal and I found myself with two hours I don't normally see before I had to be anywhere or do anything.
So I got to work. A book I thought might be dying at the back of my head was brought back to life because I decided to see what 'planning' did for it - whether it worked or not remains to be seen but working on a road map has certainly given it some direction that it didn't have before. I'm going to have to look harder and closer at this 'planning' thing - my brain treats the idea like somebody in the band just suggested we get a keyboard player in.
Shudder.
Then again, maybe the plan will turn out to be Jon Lord for the project. Filing under pending.
...and then I edited two more chapters of The Family of Noise. This book will see the light of day in April. Fact.
And if you happen to be looking for a great album to keep you company doing whatever it is you do, Us And The Night is the best album 3 Doors Down have released in years. A most welcome addition to the collection:
...more later.
The Comedy And The Tragedy
Sunday. A mega-ton of household jobs seem to have stacked up behind me. I wondered to myself whether Alice Cooper has household jobs stacking up behind him, but probably not because he never seems to be home. Being as he's on the road so relentlessly, maybe he has a housekeeper to take care of all the things that shouldn't really need taking care of because he's never there.
Anyway, I did them and figured I might just bomb out in the sofa before I go in for Round Two in front of The Typewriter Machine. I got to Channel 78,663 and there was nothing on - though I guess if I had gone back to the start, there would be different shows on to when I first begun. Instead, I decided to revisit something that used to make me happy beyond belief and I dropped on the Laurel and Hardy movie, Swiss Miss.
So far as I recall, they used to be a lot funnier than this. When the hell did Laurel and Hardy become unfunny? That's like asking when Aerosmith stopped being a giant killer of a band (except I know the answer to that: 1979). What can possibly have happened in the years since I used to roll around until my stomach hurt, that had me sit in front of the TV waiting for the movie to take over my nervous system?
Maybe they did get unfunny. Maybe it just wore off. Maybe comedy got sophisticated to a point that I can no longer go back to a more innocent time.
Or maybe I just got to be miserable - except I'm not. I was really game for it. Pensive, even.
Thats a real sad state of affairs. I'll try a few shorts from them across the week and so how they pan out, and if that doesn't work, I'll hunt down some Harold Lloyd movies and back them up with a couple from Will Hay just to be sure.
If none of those work either, I'm officially broken.
I don't tend to admire many writers these days but Karl Ove Knausgård is a huge exception for me. The world has dubbed him a literary sensation over the last few years but you know what... I suspect it could have equally gone the other way for him and he would still have carried on writing whatever he wanted. I not only like his books but I also like the way he puts himself across in interviews - which is just as honest as his novels.
This week there's a neat documentary on iPlayer in which Knausgård interviews/gets interviewed by neurosurgeon, Henry Marsh. If you're feeling cultural, it worth your time for a whole number of reasons.
But then you must go read at least the first ten pages of A Death In The Family. After that, you'll know if you're in the mood for thousands of pages of autobiographical revelation from the man. It's pretty addictive. There's also an extract here at The Vice.
Anyway, you have been warned.
Later this same day, this Great Dane came up for adoption. Sigh... what to do?
Not sure somebody else would be very impressed with a new house-mate though...
Finally today - this probably sums up more than any of us writers would care to admit and did make me laugh.
Check Grant Snider out on twitter @grantdraws
Books Attacked With A Knife
I want to learn the art of hacking up old books nobody loves anymore and making them into things of beauty... very much like this:
Or this...
And this...
A man could lose many hours of the day doing something like this - and aside from a little swordplay, almost everything else I do involves a screen. It looks complicated but it can't be insanely off-the-scale difficult because other people do it!
Consider it under investigation... but don't hold your breath over seeing any of my own paper carnage anytime soon. This might take some time.
Yesterday, I was digging around, taking a look at what cultural nourishment I could take in on a literary level in New York and discovered an event called The Franklin Park Reading Series out in Brooklyn.
So far as I can make out - and I believe my workings out to be pretty accurate - once a month, the event plays host to various up and coming writers (local and global) who then ummm... read. They've played host to writers like Kelly Link and John Wray and each event has a raffle in which people can walk away with books and literary merch.
I'm going to check it out while I'm out there - it falls at the right time - but then, I started thinking harder. Surely it's not a difficult thing to run? The concept is sound and while the South East of England may not be New York City, neither is it that far out of London to make it something feasible to get off the ground with a good chance of success.
Thus, this coming weekend, I shall begin scouting out some likely venues - I have two really good places in mind. There's no point sitting around and wishing there was a similar kind of platform. It looks very much to me like it's one of those things you need to get off your ass and actually do something about.
Sounds like a plan, right?
On a (slightly) similar note, one of the people who keeps track of things like this is Kate Gavin. She runs a tumblr called Last Night's Reading - go check it out - you'll know in about two minutes if it's something you'll get a kick out of in the long term.
Here's a clue simply because it's one of my favourites - and I agree with the statement itself one hundred percent.
That's about all I got today... be cool to each other.
Life: Reclaimed
As a part of my minimalist approach to life, this week I decided to add something instead of taking away. That thing is an alarm clock. It might not seem like a big deal, but 'installing' this little puppy at the side of the bed means I can leave those things otherwise delivered via wi-fi while I'm asleep downstairs and keep them the hell away from me first thing in the morning.
I'm quite liking the look of this. When it makes a noise, simply reach out and drop your hand on the button to silence it. I know it's a relatively simple thing not to see if you've had any messages while you were sleeping when you wake up... but I don't, so this is my solution.
The phone thing can stay downstairs in the fruit bowl with the bananas and the car keys and in my book, that's known as a good start.
I got wind of a new show this week that appears to be right up my street - though how it passed me by, I'll never know. Over on Sky Atlantic, Vinyl (from HBO) has recently started. I'm hoping it's got a touch of Californication about it but I'll take it at face value and funnel in news when I've tracked it down. I must know somebody with the damn station that can do magic.
If you happen to be wondering how the creation of words that will one day find their way into a book is going, it's going pretty good.
Slightly derailed by a magazine going to print across the next 24 hours, two birthdays within four days of each other, a dog haircut and a broken finger that seems to be getting worse instead of better, but it's going good.
I'm starting to think I should maybe take a trip to the doctor or hospital over this finger instead of my current method of home-surgery that makes use of those two well known traditional body fixers: fire and salt.
Maybe tomorrow.
Finally, gotta love a bear in the wild:
Feel free to share this page link around. Thanks.
How To Live A Life Worth Living
I broke a cardinal rule yesterday. I only went to the store to get milk and I came back with milk and a newspaper. I was standing in the queue for so long, I'd started to read the front page and figured I might as well pick it up for a closer look. Back home, I opened up the package of supplements, TV guides and fashion specials only to find nothing going on in the world that I hadn't already learned by osmosis and certainly nothing written with any style worth paying attention to.
So I guess I learned something yesterday.
Now and again, you might see something pretty neat happen in the world and think to yourself, ‘I’m going to take that on board.’
Such a thing looked me in the eye today when I read this news story about J.K. Rowling turning up (relatively) unannounced at a book reading at Orkney library. That’s called giving a damn right?
I forwarded the story to a friend who said “That’s easy to do when you’ve got £90 million sitting in the bank.” To be fair, at this point he was quick to follow it up with: “Then again, it’s pretty easy to do if you’ve got £900 sitting in the bank.”
And that dear readers, is the whole point. It’s also relatively easy to do with £90 in the bank (well maybe not all the way to Orkney), but the point is she could be bothered at all.
She could have sat at home watching the TV, gone out to dinner, hell… she could have spent the day having a wonderful time on a beach in Florida but she didn’t - she was engaged enough with people who were interested in her to be interested in return. That’s what I call a ‘class act’. That’s how you effortlessly paraglide yourself to being a legend without even trying. More people should be like this but they won’t be - I know people too well.
Shit, you could even be that person with £9 if you chose to be.
Anyway, for what it’s worth, this story has been Noted for all the right reasons - and I guess I learned something today as well.
Meanwhile, if you have a couple of hours spare in your life well lived and you like movies that are a little off the beaten track, Yosemite is a great watch.
James Franco is fantastic in it but the kids involved are even better. I'm liking Franco a lot lately, I even like his book - Palo Alto - a lot, that the critics seem to have panned into the ground since it was released:
There have been a lot of spiteful snowballs thrown over the fact that Palo Alto would never have got published if Franco didn't have a celebrity status, but hey... you can level that accusation at a lot of people - and you can also say that a lot of books by people with no celebrity status shouldn't have been published also. Regardless, I liked it and if you're here, I think you will too. The movie adaptation of Palo Alto is also kicking around on Netflix or Amazon... one of the two. I've not watched it yet, but I spotted it on there and I'll get around to it eventually.
Franco is a good role model if you're looking for somebody to admire who does his own thing regardless of what people say after the event.
And that's something else I learned today...
...which is quite enough education for one day don't you think.
Eight Grams And Other Tales of Darkness
There's a lot going on here this week. I found myself in a poetic place for one thing and filled a good portion of a new notebook with some quality work. It's all a little continuation of the poetry I've worked on before...which means work like this:
I'll be putting this out by myself through Bad Hare - and it shall be called Eight Grams, which according to popular science is the weight of the human soul. Now I've written that down, I get the feeling I may have mentioned it somewhere here before- apologies if I did. Then again, attention spans ain't what they used to be right?
I seem to have work backing up behind me like there's no tomorrow but something new will come out soon, I promise - and if it all happens to get finished around about the same time, so be it. I'm not looking anymore - I'm just 'doing it'.
Anyway, I was on a roll this afternoon and just when I had gotten to a part that was worth stopping over to make more coffee, I fumbled getting the pen back inside the cap, and dropped it on the floor: nib first.
It couldn't have landed any more vertically if I'd thrown it.
Hot damn, that was the best pen I had for writing. Super-fast flow and everything - my finger tips have even shaped themselves to its body.
Which is probably why a samurai always carries two swords... but when I picked up my second sword, I found that I haven't used it for so long, the ink had dried up inside of the nib. There are probably other crappy pens around the house I'm sure but it's not the same. It's like deciding to drive a few hundred miles in somebody else's car.
Some time later, I discovered that you can buy replacement nibs. Why didn't I know this before? If replacement nibs are available, I'm thinking that the smart thing to do is to get two fast flow nibs and then I'll have two sharp swords to head into battle.
That my friends, is a thing known as 'A Plan'.
Or as my mother would say: "If that's all you have to worry about, things are probably OK."
On the other work-table right now, I'm talking to Robert Borbas and somewhere amongst all of the talk, we should come up with a feature article of some worth. I love what this man does. If you made me point a finger at somebody I thought had the future of his world in the palm of his hand, he would be it. When you're putting out work like this, you don't have to answer to anybody:
Off skin, his work is just as fine:
If you're in the market, you can find him right here - though I guess you might have to wait a while.
OTHER PEOPLE'S STUFF:
If you're in the mood for a movie that will raise your spirits and not crash it brutally onto the rocks towards the end, I've just watched The Dark Horse - and it's a wonderful and beautiful piece of work. You can find it for rent in the iTunes store but that was the extent of my lust to find it - if you're not an iTunes kind of person, it's likely around somewhere. More importantly, who knew a movie about chess could stop you from hitting the pause button, stop you from making coffee and hunting down snacks... or even blinking for that matter.
Away from the beaten track of the multiplex and the industry wheels that make you watch things you didn't really want to, there's magic happening if you choose to look.
In other news of things to buoy your spirits along the way to a watery grave, the new Sixx AM album - Prayers For The Damned - is coming down the line (though not fast enough for my liking) - it's available as a pre-order at your usual pre-order places with the track 'Rise' already out in the world for your delight and testimony. I love it. When it lands, it will look like this:
Meanwhile, over at the place in which you used to hide under the blankets with a torch into the early hours of the morning, John Connolly's new Charlie Parker novel - A Time Of Torment - is also coming and due to land April 7th. The cover looks like this... and for the record, the comment on the front from The Independent does not lie:
With the two things I really look forward to in any given year both out around the same time, the world had better get its act together or it could be a long, desolate summer leading into a long cold winter.
QUOTE OF THE DAY:
“If you set yourself to it, you can live the same life, rich or poor. You can keep on with your books and your ideas."
George Orwell | Down And Out In Paris And London
Crouching Flu Virus, Hidden Music
Oh brother... taken down by some kind of flu for a couple of days. I don't normally do the 'sick' thing but this one got me good and proper. One minute, I was all prepared to cover the world with fire and ice, the next I was lying on the sofa like a soap opera tragedy wondering what I'd done that was so bad to have clay injected into muscles I didn't know I had.
I think two days is long enough to let any disease have its way with a kindly host though, so we're ignoring it now. It can hang around if it really wants to but let's see how it copes with a diet of nothing but caffeine and nicotine. Surely a more inhospitable environment in which to thrive cannot be found this side of Vesuvius?
Still, being taken down a peg or two in your own head can be quite handy. I didn't think about writing anything at all for those two days and happened to write quite a lot by accident. I also 'accidentally' watched some YouTube videos about how to make your own book completely from scratch - not sure I want to get into that but it's very cool seeing other people doing neat stuff. Maybe that should say, 'I'm not sure I have the talent for that' as all of them were great artists regardless of whether they made their own books or not. Thanks to Jonathan Carroll for that nugget - and if the name means nothing to you, you should go seek him out. Immediately.
Back in the land of something akin to normal, I saw today that netflix are about to launch an originally commissioned movie sequel to Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon called Sword of Destiny. It debuts on Friday and if it's anything even close to the original, all bets are off. TV as we know it will be officially dead. It even has a proper poster - they didn't have to commission one I guess, but they did:
OK, so there's not a whole lot of work gone into it, but it's little steps in the right direction that's for sure. Then again, I don't recall the original poster being something to write home about either. The movie itself though... that's a whole other story.
Consider the bar raised. In theory at least...
I got myself in the mood for some new/old vinyl too. Odds on it appearing within 24 hours: slim - but it will be something to behold when it does arrive. What is it? It's a reasonably pristine copy of Young Man's Blues by Rock City Angels. If you weren't in the loop back in 1987 (ish), you missed a treat. Popular rumour has it the band were signed up by Geffen in order to bury them from being in competition with Guns n Roses - and maybe that was smart thinking. If you believed the hype that GnR were the most destructive band in the world, it's a good thing that nobody ever gave Rock City Angels too much money to prove otherwise.
In my opinion, they were a far superior band - and not that it's hugely relevant but in their early days, Rock City Angels were once home to Johnny Depp too. If you need proof of life, here:
Anyway, this album was a tough find but there are copies out there. They appear to have released some other material along the way but nothing at the level of Young Man's Blues - and I'm very much looking forward to it being part of my life again.
I'm pretty sure there are bands this good out there today (there must be) but why do they insist on hiding from me?