THE PEN IS MORE PORTABLE THAN THE SWORD
Time Is Not Waiting In The Wings
Oh man, where does all the time go? It's my little girls first day at big school today. My little girl who's not so little anymore at the big school that will get smaller the longer she is there. I know this for a fact because other little girl who is now much bigger is in her last year there. When smaller person leaves, it will be 2017 and older small person will be 20. Five years that will no doubt shoot past in the blink of an eye. Which got me to thinking, what am I going to do in those five years? So I made a plan - a list of lists if you will. It's frightening how much you think can get done in five years - but only when you look back on the last five years and realise how much you had planned and didn't get done. Which calls for a new way of thinking.
It seemed smart to me to figure out why the things I really wanted to do never happened. The things that did happen, happened and are out in the world taking care of themselves, so they're not a concern. But why do things fall through the net? The first port of call is to take an average day/week/month and see where time was wasted - man, there's a lot of it. TV is the biggest enemy, but I began to address that a little while back. With the assistance of a little technology, I now watch TV when I want to watch it instead of when TV wants me to. I've found that I can do quite a lot of other things during this block too. You can fill the washing machine, successfully plan out a magazine, go through the days scraps of paper, delete a ton of emails via a separate device.. it's a long list these days and (so long as your not watching something like Spiral with fast moving subtitles), you don't really miss much. The only time I ever sweep the decks, turn off the phone and something on TV has my full attention is when Doctor Who is on. 50 minutes of a week. I think that's allowed.
This train of thought is a work in progress as the more I do it, the more I find myself syphoning out the shows that aren't worth spending time with.
Something else that's been worth doing - and this happened by accident - is a self imposed media blackout. I don't read newspapers or watch the news ever. If something important happens, you pick it up soon enough from breezing through the day. This doesn't include magazines though. They have a new way of 'being' around here. If it's not available for the iPad, it does't get bought. The very few magazines that I do respect are now on a digital subscription and get read or flicked through during this TV block. If there's something worth reading properly, it gets earmarked and digested properly during other dead times. This is a far cry from a couple of years back when it was actually painful to tip many years worth of magazines into the crusher. Do I miss them? Hell, I can't even remember what they were.
I'm getting there with this. The result is that the end of the day is stuffed with outside influences and then I go to sleep. It's worth bearing in mind here that I go to bed between 1 and 2am and get up about 7am. That's enough for me based on a very simple idea.
1. Never go to bed in the same day you got up in.
So much time is wasted by being asleep when you don't need that much. Out of everybody I know, I am the only person who does this. On average, my day has three to four extra hours in it than everybody else. On the outside, that's an extra 28 hours a week, which by my reckoning makes my week eight days long. A whole extra 52 days a year over my peers. That's a lot of time - and sure, it doesn't really make an eight day week but as with everything in life, it doesn't really matter what the reality of the situation is, only what you think the reality of the situation is.
With all this written down, I feel pretty good (it's actually a really difficult thought process to write all of this down) but despite lists, plans, good intentions and smart thinking on my behalf, I still find that I don't get as much done as I would like to. Maybe I have unrealistic expectations of myself. Maybe I am trying to make up for the time wasted in the past. I'm still working on that. High expectations of the self that are unachievable are the fastest way to disappointment. Fact.
So this is my mindset for this week. Being brutally honest about what I expect of myself. "Working hard" does not count. I swear I get as much done by working creatively as I do by working hard. One of the keys in this area is that old nugget of Covey wisdom - the circle of influence. It's basically a circle within a circle. The stuff in the internal circle is the stuff I can do something about and the space outside of that circle, is stuff that I can't do anything about and therefore is no concern of mine until it comes inside of the little circle. If you're observant and proactive instead of reactive, the stuff outside never comes in without your permission.
Here's a good example: I can write a book, I can do everything I can to sell and promote the book but I actually have no control over whether people choose to buy it or not after that. That's for other people to decide. Once you've got that figured out and stop worrying about it, you immediately gain about 25% of your time back for other stuff. It's really simple. See it coming. Identify it as something that is not your cross to bear and move on. If it is your cross to bear, bring it in to the circle, deal with it and move on again. Eventually, you learn to react with a pro-react stance.
Jeez. That's quite enough of that - but thanks for listening. It's good to say things out loud...
Asylum of the Daleks
I thought I would wait until the show had sunk in and I'd watched it a couple of times before I made any comment - not that there's an awful lot to comment on really. For the first time in a good few years, I've taken my Saturday night obsession offline and previewed nothing at all. No previews, no trailers (well, maybe just 'who killed all the Daleks'), no gossip or speculation.
It got to the point last season that I was getting really pissed at how much the geek brigade could spoil things. Not simply by ranting about how they would do it better and what they'd like to see, but even more at how much they think they have the rights to anything to do with the show because they've been into it for "a long time".
I feel really old - and I'm sure some of you out there will be able to put your x-box controller down for long enough to tell me simply not to look, but once you know the Christmas presents are hidden under the bed, it's very hard not to take a tiny peak...
Anyway, my own thoughts on it are pretty much the same as Mr Moffat. There's a couple of classic enemies that could be resurrected for the good of the show but not many. For the record, some Ice Warriors would be cool and I could also live with a few Sea Devils, but all the time the creative vision is there to come up with far more sophisticated beasts like the Silents, the Angels, that damn fine minotaur and the sweeping melodrama that was Family of Blood or The Doctor Dances, is there really any point to driving in reverse? Seems to me that we've all started taking the Doctor very seriously these days. Can you imagine an episode in which a wheelie bin sucking in one of the main characters is still acceptable?
All of this aside, the premise for Asylum of the Daleks is, quite frankly, genius. The Daleks aren't scary any more - I'm not sure they ever where - but they are a superb part of the pantheon and it's good to see them in action when the plot is woven like this. I've watched 'Asylum' three times now and I'm not getting tired of it and that's the sign of a good 'n' tight script to me. We've come full circle. Just like watching old clips of Nazis on TV is fascinating without the terror, so it is with their fictional counterparts.
As for the prospect of 'that' new assistant - there's a little part of me that hopes she will stay inside the tin can for the remainder of the season. That would crank the dynamic beyond anything I had even thought possible, but I won't be disappointed if that's not the case. This year, like I used to do in seasons past, I'm rolling with the punches to see where we're headed. For me, Asylum of the Daleks is almost up there with Blink, Family of Blood and my other iconic favourite, The Girl in the Fireplace. That's no bad place to be.
And you know what? The new season will be fine because it always is. The internet is good at a lot of things but one thing it's completely useless at is enhancing my enjoyment of the best TV programme ever created.
Besides, not being online and turning your phone off for 50 minutes a week is probably good for your health.
To wrap up, I don't think there are any spoilers to be had here. I believe these posters are an official free for all - and man, they are beautiful - although I have purposely missed one out because I wasn't too keen on it and I like to give y'all something to do in the evenings. Somebody should go back in time and work like a dog on doing one of these for every single episode ever and then release them on a drip feed through er... some place official where they won't get in trouble. Feast thine eyes:
Finally on my Who travels this week, I'm not sure if these come under the heading of cooler or just different, but I love these two graphics. They need crediting - so if you know who they're by, let me know. That doesn't mean I'm not going to try and find out myself...
Wisdom of the Gods (III)
"This is not your playground - it's my heart" From Here We Are Juggernaut/Coheed and Cambria
You can watch the video here:
I am just as excited about their new album The Afterman as I am about the new Doctor Who season.
44 and excited about an album again. That makes me happier than I have a right to be.
Claudio and I are in competition to see who can make their hair explode the best. So far Claudio has the edge but I'm gaining on him...
Daydream Believer
I must stop listening to the broadcasts that come after a very excellent breakfast show on the radio. The topics that they choose as discussions of interest are scraping so close to the bottom of the barrel, they must have started digging into the earth by now. Today, we took a look at a news story in which we see ebay planning to ban the sale of inanimate goods on their site. Very specifically, the sale of online/telephone psychic/tarot readings and the also the broader spectrum which includes such things as werewolf spells - it's not very specific on whether it plans to ban the sale of spells to turn you into a werewolf or stop you from turning into one. Probably both I would think. Before I get the shovel out, here's the official statement on the matter:
"We want customers to have great experiences on eBay, and we regularly review categories and update policies to deliver the best shopping and selling experience possible. Based on our long-standing policy restricting the sale of intangible items on eBay, we are discontinuing a small number of categories within the Metaphysical category, as transactions in these categories can be difficult to verify and resolve. We believe this update will enhance the experience on eBay and benefit our customers."
I think this is a real shame. Nobody is being ripped off in this scenario. Let's take a look at the broader picture. Anybody wanting a psychic reading done that badly is going to get one regardless of ebay's policy on the matter - I'm not even sure why they would need to advertise on ebay anyway. It's not like there's a shortage of psychics in the world. I could walk out of the door and find one before I found a fruit shop I'm sure. Having once done the tarot circuit myself - and 100% believing myself to be genuine, (I stopped because I got tired of people being so materialistic and short-sighted about this great adventure called life) - it is what it is and won't go away despite rather a lot of people thinking it should. These days, I'm not really pro- or con- the psychic world. I've come to realise you either believe in something or you don't and that's the end of the story for every human being on the planet. Once you get that into your head, you can start living as a free person. You can change your belief system, but really, all you're doing is choosing to believe in something else. It doesn't make it any more or less true/false for the human race no matter what you believe (unless you're some kind of psycho terrorist I guess).
The 'psychic' industry doesn't need policing. Sure, there are charlatans out there but they don't stick around for long. If you're really good at pretending to be psychic, maybe you really are. There are plenty of people who tell you they are plumbers or mechanics who haven't got a clue what they're doing who still have jobs. I find that a lot more annoying. Not as annoying as people who write because they have a keyboard in front of them, but still...
If you don't believe in the spirit world/werewolves/sea monsters, why would you choose to care anyway? Surely there's no better instant karma in the world than two fools fooling each other in exchange for money. And there lies the key. If there was no money to be made in it, how many psychics would we have on the world then? If there was no money or profile in being a doubter, you probably wouldn't do that either and content yourself to be a barrista in Starbucks, which is probably where most opinionated professionals belong anyway. We could say the same about most religions. The Christian face of God is acceptable in every city, town and village in the UK but there's not much proof for the existence of that either - just a lot of believers. Christians run their churches from donations by members and there's nothing wring with that. It doesn't mean I can't get on with my life... although Tuesday evening's hour long bell ringing practice does. Am I free to play Slipknot outside the Vicarage at an hour of my choosing? No.
As with everything from the day time began, belief is everything. Believe or don't believe. What you believe in is true for the time you believe in it and what you don't, isn't. It's a really simple equation and it works regardless of what you believe - that last part of the comment makes it sound more complicated than it really is... sorry.
Anyway, my life has become a whole lot easier since I figured this out.
Imagine all the people, living life...
Nine Tenths of the Law?
“Any fool can be happy. It takes a man with a real heart to make beauty out of the stuff that makes us weep.”― Clive Barker
I'm off to Colorado in a few weeks. Three to be exact. I'm really psyched about it - why, I even had some plans of how to make the trip fly by without a hitch. In my wisdom, I thought I'd travel light with nothing but the bare essentials which in my world amounts to nothing more than an iphone. I figured that everything else could be bought while I'm there and recycled back into the system before I come back home. At the most, I thought I'd take a shoulder bag with a shirt, some spare socks and pants but it was pointed out to me today that it would look really suspicious. Which has left me wondering, in what kind of world does not taking anything aboard a plane appear to be suspicious? Seriously, if there's anybody reading that works in airport security, can there even be a grain of truth in this? At first I thought it was nonsense, but the world is so paranoid right now, I'm beginning to doubt my own sane thoughts on this.
The idea of going about as far away from home as I could on a horizontal axis before I started coming back again with nothing but an iPhone is quite appealing. It really floats my sense of minimalism that it is totally possible to work and play in the world without having to rely on anything at all. I heard this again over the weekend, reiterated by somebody on a radio show. "Never own more possessions than you can fit into one suitcase otherwise the possessions will begin to own you." Even that suitcase sounds a bit big for my liking. I really like the sound of 'your pockets' instead of 'suitcase' but that might be rather impractical in the real world. I'll come back to this when I've discovered something I think is a reasonable size but right now, I had best keep my thoughts to myself as I'm still busy archiving a rather large library of books into an easily transportable digital library that lives on the cloud. Once I've got that figured out, I'll be a lot happier about the whole thing... and the irony of my library owning me has already struck home thanks for asking. I'm in transition phase. After that fire a couple of years back, I'm still in awe of how everything you think is important can be taken away from you in less than an hour.
Just to recap on the rules of this, I read an article a few years back about somebody trying to get through life with less than a hundred possessions. I thought this was ridiculously high actually because at the time, I didn't think I had that many (and I didn't) and decided that a more sensible number would be six. Six possessions. This doesn't include stuff like clothes, the tool box, the fridge and the sofa - well, it doesn't for me anyway because they're just things that are useful around the house. I could care less if they weren't there. The six objects need to be things you could put on the front seat of the car, go somewhere else for an extended period of time and carry on living like you hadn't missed a beat. It might be cheating to load an iPad with an entire digital library but being as I can't insure a digital library of books and music against loss or theft, they don't really exist do they. I didn't make the rules, I'm just bending them to suit. Which may raise the question if you can't insure them against loss or theft because they don't exist, how do people steal them? Big industries can't have it both ways can they? Of course they can - who am I kidding.
So far, my possession list is a little weird. I don't need a MacBook, an iPad and an iPhone but that's what I've got. Strictly speaking though, only the iPad is mine. Could I get by with it in the absence of the other two? I think I could, but I would need to buy some kind of phone. So that's two possessions right there both of which would allow me to get on with work and pleasure without much of a headache at all. That leaves me with four. I guess one of them would have to be my car without question - which leaves three.
The bicycle maybe? I hit the road for a swift five miles this evening and fell right back into being fourteen years old. Let's throw it in there because I don't see it going away now. That would leave two things - you get the picture. I know nobody has to live like this but I find that I want to. It's amazingly liberating not to want things, not to have to attend to things or be bothered about whether you have these things or not. Better still to not be at the mercy of things. 'Things' do indeed have a habit of owning your ass when you're not looking. Try and get rid of some stuff tomorrow and you'll see what I mean. There's a box of photographs that I haven't finished scanning yet too, but once they are digital, I'll probably look at them more as digital files than I ever will in the box they live in. For some reason though, they appear to be more like memories simply because they are in a box. I wonder sometimes how a head gets to learn things like this.
So given that I don't actually own anything to really speak of, what exactly am I supposed to take to Colorado to make it authentic anyway? Not that it's not authentic - I really don't need anything while I'm there and so don't see the point of taking it in the first place. Socks, pants and a big jumper in case it gets cold? That ought to do it - and maybe that's not such a bad idea anyway.
Footnote: not owning more things than I need doesn't mean I'm not keen on an incredibly healthy bank balance. I think it's important to state that right here and now because you never know when the Gods of Fortune and Fate are reading your blog. Having a minimum amount of 'things' is very liberating but obviously not quite as liberating as, say, eight million to fall back on.
Wisdom of the Gods (II)
"Call immediately. Time is running out. We both need to do something monstrous before we die."Ralph Steadman to Hunter Thompson
A sentiment that is hitting the floor in the House of Smith today.
DDP - The Punisher
For reasons still not quite clear to me, this afternoon we were in the chemist picking up the remainder of Eleanor's prescription when the urge to quit smoking struck. Again. With three left in the packet, I squashed it, threw it in the bin that sat next to the counter and bought myself a triple pack of the mint things that helped me keep off them last time. Cherry. It feels right at the moment. I shall try not to think about it too much because that's when bad things happen (ie: driving to the all night garage in search of goodies).
This was followed by my first twenty minute session of yoga with DDP that I've been putting off for the best part of a fortnight. Not sure what the hell I'm talking about? Best place to start is here. Somewhere along the road, this will be good for me but this evening, it crucified me to hell and back. It was 30 degrees when I got out of the car and certainly not much cooler an hour later. Maybe that contributed to the litres of sweat that came out of me. This will be an interesting ride over the coming months that's for sure. Combined with the plans coming from the You Are Your Own Gym project, some well researched supplements, a reduced calorie intake, close to zero wheat and some irregular fasting - though I still need to figure that part out - I might be able to get my ass back into some kind of shape that resembles a human being before the end of the year. I also went out and got myself one of these today:
And the point of all this? I'm not entirely sure to be honest - but it's no bad thing, right? Going away always puts things in perspective but this last trip - being outside and away from 'the machine' for more than a few hours - has really rattled the cage. Next thing you know, I'll be taking up some kind of sport...
Wisdom of the Gods (I)
"When I write, I just sit down and I write. If you can’t do that, you can’t be a writer. Even when you’re sick. Sometimes I’d be very sick, coughing, with a fever and I’d be going down the stairs to work and my wife would say “You’re sick, don’t work today” — but really, if you don’t work, who else is going to do it?"
— Harry Harrison
You Can't Land The TARDIS There...
It's been a long year - I figured it might be time to kick back for a week to regroup a little, so after the Manchester Show last weekend (which was superb, thanks for asking) we headed out for North Wales in search of some kind of downtime. Thus, in a week that contained a castle, a crazy bookshop, a TARDIS on a pier, some cable cars, a river, a horse-drawn canal boat, a big old Roman city and some extreme head space, I also found some time to slot in a spot of research in the shape of a trip to a certain house which features rather heavily in Turn The Lamp Down Low. I'm still not sure whether to name it as being the actual venue of events (in or out of the book) but it's a pretty big deal to have the colour and the shape of the 'main character' fleshed out in their entirety before I go any further. It's been more than twenty years since I last visited 'the house'.
Much has changed and yet, nothing has changed.
That's the way everything should be in life.
In amongst all of this, we managed to squeeze in a major family meal for 16 estranged people. We've had it on the table for almost a year now and you have to love it when a plan comes together. I think living rather a lot of life online can make you appreciate what life offline used to be like if you're of the mind to look at it that way. I got it into my head that it would be wrong for the next time we all saw each other to be at another funeral.
Take a look around. It's easy to fix if you find yourself in a similar situation. A phone call and a couple of emails is all it takes - and it was one of the best nights I've had in quite some time. It's good to see that despite far too many years disappearing under the bridge that everybody remains much the same. Like I said: Much has changed and yet, nothing has.
•••
Over the past weekend, I picked up a copy of Some Kind of Fairy Tale by Graham Joyce. I read a tiny little review of it somewhere and figured I would give it a shot. Sometimes a book comes along that gives you a good kick in the ass just to remind you of a few things. Not in the way that those monsters like Jonathan Strange or Imajica did (for they are the Olympians that sit on the top of the mountain for me), but one that reminds you to be as consistently great as possible. To say it's easily the best book I've read this year so far would not be a lie.
From start to finish, it's absolutely captivating - I don't think I've ever read anything quite like it. When a young girl appears back at the family home after being missing for twenty years and swears on her life that it was the fairies that took her away, the book had better go one way (a full on children's fantasy) or the other (a magical journey into the dark side of the human psyche) in the most bombastic way possible and it's the latter of these paths that Joyce finds himself on. Give it a whirl. I've been telling everybody that cares to listen about it - there's no disappointment to be found here. It's truly beautiful. Beautiful enough for me to track down a copy of The Tooth Fairy by Joyce which has to be worth a damn.
I might even be ever so slightly jealous and that doesn't happen very often at all...
•••
As is always the way with my holidays, I come back with a head more full of ideas and concepts than when I left. This trip has been no exception. What I didn't expect was to find that somebody somewhere had tracked down my trial run of August Moon's first instalment - The Monster Magnet - and, better still, publicly say nice things about it. As soon as I've mastered the artwork for the covers, it appears it might be time to make the old beast public again and finally commit to the schedule I'd set up for it.
More later... lots of catching up to do.
Alphabet Street
I picked up a copy of Ronin Ro's biography of Prince yesterday - Inside The Music And The Masks. It's shaping up to be really good. I'd never heard of Ronin before but he seems to have his shit together and on closer inspection, I see he's been putting in the time at Vanity Fair, Rolling Stone and Playboy, which doesn't automatically make him great but I'm liking what I've read so far. Must investigate further. (Edit: And now, having investigated further, this will be the only book I ever buy of his... still, Prince is Prince. It would take a monumental effort even for a schoolchild to mess up that story...)
Yesterday morning, I was telling Mike over at the Void about how brutally punishing these "You Are Your Own Gym" workouts are. To which, he suggested that I might want to combine it with some yoga.
Not any old yoga. Man Yoga. Yoga from the mind of Diamond Dallas Page. That's right - he of The Diamond Cutter. Take a look at what's on offer here (not that I'm in quite as bad a shape as some of the grizzled veterans captured on video). It not only looks great. It looks hard and great, so I've scheduled into tomorrow afternoon. I tell you - it looks hard but I'll bet quite a large sum of money that it will be a lot harder than it looks too, at least for a few weeks.
So, with a combination of being my own gym and some knackered old wrestlers yoga plan (which is pretty much why I'm knackered anyway), things are looking up. Next stop? Triple Iron Man Challenge! Or maybe I'll settle for simply not feeling like a sack of hammers everyday. That sounds more like it. Anyway, looks to me like there's quite a number of discs to get through and Mike has loaned me the first one... this one could run and run.
Meanwhile, I've spent the last three nights putting together a proposal for an agent. I'm down to a shortlist of three (can I afford to be picky?) and take it from me, it's damned hard work analysing your work with a business mind. I don't think I'd much like to start a piece of work after I'd written a proposal - I think you'd lose the brilliance and fire of your idea and wind up trying to shove a square peg in a round hole.
I've also started work on Project X (more about that in about 6 months when it's complete), had a great idea for Project Y (which I don't think will ever get off the ground simply because of the concept behind it) and... well, I don't have a Project Z. That's a good thing at this stage of the game.
I almost forgot - travelling back in time like all groovy Time Lords do every now and again - I picked up a copy of The Amazing Joy Buzzards graphic novel 'Here Come The Spiders' at the weekend. I don't know why it slipped through the net when it came out but it's really good. Make that Really Good. Loads of great inventive and original material in it - and because it's slightly on the indie side of the tracks, gets away with a whole bunch of stuff that they never would otherwise.
This week, I've also gone back in time and I'm listening to Stephen King's On Writing again... well, actually I'm listening to it for the first time but I've read it before. If you're in the writing groove and sometimes wonder about exactly what the hell it is you're doing, it's always worth coming back to this place as a solid point of reference. It's never boring and always gets me back in the right mood whenever I hit those brick walls we all encounter every now and again.
Sometimes I wish I could read Stephen King for the first time again - stay up all night long ploughing through Pet Sematary or Salem's Lot and hoping to get at least half an hour of sleep before you had to get up for school - but then I think to myself, better just to concentrate on trying to be the person that some kid says that about in the future.
Aching legs, a mermaid and a cool chapter written...
I have to tell you, this You Are Your Own Gym routine is kicking my ass from one end of the street to the other and back again. I ache like I haven't ached in years and this is a good thing but trying to lower myself into the car this morning sure as hell told me I was doing something right. The other thing that I did right was to cancel my gym membership. There's nothing on offer there that can better this. So, thus far, really impressed with it and totally recommended. The downside of a harsh look at yourself is having to address things you really don't want to. My food intake has been out of control lately for no other reason than bad habits really. So last week, we decided to cut wheat from the household diet. Harsh.
Do you know how many things are made with wheat or have wheat as part of their make-up? It seems to be everything I've ever liked - but I can't handle any 'great idea' that's too complex as I never stick to it, so instead of doing a wheat free diet and having to look at every single thing in the cupboard, we came at it through the back door and simply decided that only meat, fruit and vegetables were allowed in. I've forgotten something... dairy. Dairy products are allowed as well at the moment but I'm going to have to look at that.
Anyway, all of this gym and food stuff has been propelled by a general feeling of going downhill and a need to arrest it. I guess you hit your forties and all those things you once took for granted begin to leave the building. Not that I'm knocking on heaven's door or anything like that, but I'm two Dads down and that kind of has a knock on effect in the head. Not that they had a habit of walking on the wild side or anything. Just the way the house of cards fell.
Anyway, super busy this weekend with lots of words being laid down for the day job - I'm sure those deadlines are getting closer together behind my back. On which subject - I started thinking about the next tattoo. I found this mermaid pic and it started a little chain reaction in my head. I know who I've got in mind to start the work but I reckon it's going to be at least six months in the planning before we even get started. All I know at this stage of the game is that it will be both complex and excellent by the time it's finished.
I'm chipping away at Raised on Radio on a daily basis now. I'm hoping it will be finished sooner rather than later so that I can spend more time than I currently have assigned on the design and production, but so far, so good. Other projects are also coming to the boil - by the end of the year, I should be in a really good place to launch the plan that is known behind the scenes as "2013". When I started these 'plans' in my head, it seemed really dumb to attach calendar years to them, but a fact of life is that as humans in the western world, this is how we measure our time. It works because it's easily divided into months and weeks. It's not set in stone but I can be a lazy dog sometimes and it helps - a little - to have this sort of timeframe to work within. I tried it the rock n roll way for years and got nowhere, so at least by embracing this loose plan, work is getting done. I guess it would be different if I had a publisher and agent breathing down my neck.
On days like today though, when a 3,000 word chapter on one of my favourite bands (Sweet) dripped from my fingers like they had been there all along, I don't much care.
On days like today, I know I'm doing the right thing.
Tomorrow... who knows. I was never much of a tomorrow person anyway. Let's wring this one dry first.
The Big Switcheroo
To drive a stake in the day that was Tuesday, we headed over to Waterstones/Cafe Nero in search of some kind of differentiation between day and night. Nero is kind of 'stuck on' to the bookstore upstairs and between the books and the coffee, somebody had made made a pop-up promo for 50 Shades of Grey on a little round table that also had a hand-made sign that read "Grab a copy of what everybody is reading". And rather obviously, piled up on the table were multiple copies of said book. I can't remember if I blogged about this or not, but when they did a similar thing at the supermarket last week, they shifted about 100 copies in about 10 minutes. However, they moved a grand total of zero in the bookstore. That speaks volumes to me - and it's essentially this: books placed in a supermarket and heavily discounted are bought by people who like to read but are prepared to be sold to/told what to read/haven't really got a clue what they want. People who go to bookstores in search of a read however are the complete opposite, know what they want (ish) and are prepared to hunt for it. Sure, there's some crossover there but not enough to be bothered about. This is partly why publishers have been able to propel somebody like Katie Price into the stratosphere and make her a bestselling author - because people are freaking lazy.
Why does this bother me? The publishers don't care, Ms Price doesn't, the people who buy her books certainly don't - everybody in the circle is happy. It's not jealousy that's for sure. Is it because I feel the people lapping it up have been duped? People get duped all the time in business.
Anyway - my big plan was to take some copies of Black Dye, White Noise and while nobody was looking, switch the copies of my book with 50 Shades, sit down for a coffee and wait to see what happened. And now that a big package has arrived with some more books in it, this afternoon I just might do that. I think it's a plan worthy of sacrificing a few books to.
LATER THAT SAME DAY:
For the last er… couple of years, ever since I took over The Mag for a living, I seem to have gone from 'pretty OK for my age kind of weight and physique' to 'not so pretty OK for my age kind of weight.' This week, I decided to do something about it - actually that's not true. Back in February I decided to do something about it. If you're up for a bit of a story and a little inspiration, read on.
A long time ago, I blew my knee (and shoulder, though not so bad) at jujitsu. Nobody to blame, just the way it panned out after previous years at tae-kwon do, wrestling and fencing. Stick that on top of ten years of thinking your invincible in a band and things ain't looking so hot in the joint department. For the record, being in a band is pretty good exercise. Equipment is not light to carry around, you get good at spacial awareness and flights of stairs and if you're playing/rehearsing properly, it's way more exhausting than hitting the gym. I tried out fencing again a few months back but even that put a stupid amount of pressure on the knee - this is what's prompted my rethink of 2012 (and I see now that I look, that 2012 is nearly over but never mind. There'll be another year along shortly).
So. I joined the gym back in February. It's a good gym. Clean, well run - that sort of thing. There's plenty of machines and free weights but I thought I'd stick to the machines initially because it locks your posture down and I don't need to be blowing anything out any more than it already is. Then, when I figured I was ready, the plan was to move across to free weights. I figured a year would be a good time frame to get this done in.
Fact of the matter is though, I'm not getting on so well with the gym no matter how well equipped it is. It's pretty dull even with an iPod and it's just another gym that thinks everybody wants to work out to high energy dance music - which I believe is technically not true - the best music for working out to is rock because most of it has a basic 4/4 rhythm. We all swim a few times a week on a good week, maybe twice on a bad/hectic deadline week but it's not enough - it keeps the wolves from the door but I need some kind of divine intervention and I think I've found it.
I'm one of those people who is more than aware of food content and calorie intake, but it won't stop me finishing off an entire cake or whole packet of biscuits if its in the cupboard (note: if you don't buy it, you can't eat it). Anyway, I found this book a couple of weeks back. It's called You Are Your Own Gym and, in a word, it's freaking excellent. It's the only book you'll ever need on the subject of your body and all it really takes - as far as I can tell right now - is commitment. I've done week one this week and I've got to say, for what amounts to a few simple exercises that take up about half an hour, it's the most brutally punishing workout I've ever done. Honestly. I ache in places I forgot even existed.
Now all I have to do is keep it up.
Simple. I think.
Black Dye, White Noise vs 50 Shades
There are way too many e-readers on the market right now, but I'm trying to keep up. The bastard stepchild is the kobo. I don't know anybody that owns one but I've seen people buying them so yesterday I made Black Dye White Noise available for it.
Loading the book as an author is simple enough, pretty slick in fact. The reader 'experience' is varied. That's about the best thing I can say about it. During testing, I downloaded the desktop app for Mac which is OK I guess, but the app for the iphone is awful. Let me put it like this: I can throw a website together in a day but I can't even get the sample of the book to load on my phone. That's how complicated it is. I assume I'm missing something here but if I am, then everybody else must be too and that's not good. I'll roll with it, because it's the same source file that I used for ibooks and the kindle.
Give it time and only the strong will survive in this market and that will be a good thing.
Anyway, during my testing on the kobo, I must have had the 50 Shades trilogy pimped at me at least a dozen times. Thanks for that. Turns out e-readers have simply taken the same marketing strategy as bricks and mortar stores to sell their wares. All that technology and the entire contents of the internet at your feet and you choose to try and sell me the very thing I can buy in more places than I can get milk? Is that really smart, really dumb or just plain lazy?
Not my worry. Black Dye White Noise is available if you have a kobo and I'm moving on...
The Monday Carvery
Although it may not look like it, things are coming together nicely here. Sure - there's some tabs missing up in the navigation as of today, but there is a good reason behind it. Promise! For maybe the third time this year, I'll point out that I was taking the whole of 2012 to work on this site 'live' to get it where it needed to be and todays decisions contribute to that plan. So - while I'm busy doing stuff, I hope you don't miss anything in the meantime...
Smile for the camera...
Aside from the fact that my buddy Scott Cole took the time to be bothered to both mention and pimp Black Dye White Noise during an interview he did with Comic Book Resources and hit the tweetdeck with it too, the interview itself is more than worth a read for all kinds of reasons - particularly if you're a photographer who's treading the same old tired and worn boards and needs a shot in the arm (and who doesn't from time to time).
My eldest daughter thinks she might want to be a surf photographer when she leaves school (just a year away now - may the Gods have eternal mercy on my soul). As is totally correct when you're 15, in her head I'm sure she thinks this will involve hanging out at the beach and er, taking pictures of people surfing. For doing this, she will be paid handsomely by a surf magazine - preferably Carve - which is a great freaking mag if you've never read or want to see how a photo-based mag ought to be put together - and live in an apartment that looks like it once belonged to Rachel and Monica.
I'm totally behind her on this. Surfing is a great lifestyle to be a part of professionally and infinitely better than some dreams that she could have gotten into her head. Working with Scott as I do and also my other photo buddy, Chiaki (currently on tour with Daniel Craig and the 007 movie shooting set pieces for Warners in Japan), I know the harsh reality of being out in the field and how much you work you have to do to get the tiniest percentage accepted into the media and an even tinier percentage that you'll actually get paid for.
If I tell her any of this, it will probably either a) kill it for her or b) make her think I don't know what I'm talking about. What would a great Dad do in this situation? Wait to be asked for help? Sneak help in whenever opportunity arises? Think 'fuck it, nobody ever helped me'? Pull all the strings I can lay my hands on? Turn the TV on and crack open a beer?
The best I can probably do is introduce her to these people at some point. They don't even need to say anything - I think just being able to see them working in a safe environment will be enough and certainly of more practical use than signing up to a class at school where they say it will last an hour and by the time teacher has cocked about doing whatever it is they do to waste time, being left with only 20 minutes. I worked with a BBC cameraman once, who while studying part-time to be said cameraman, told me that if he'd known how little work they do every day, he would have signed up for a full-time course and still been able to hold down a job.
I guess everything will work itself out. It always does.
The other one wants to be a vet, but she's only eleven. My hands are tied on that one...
Ker-plunk!
In the defiant spirit of Cherie Priest - who likes to write things in her blog such as Things accomplished in fiction and Things accomplished in real life, I thought I might bring these two items to the table for today's blog post as I really like the way her blog publicly flaunts information such as: Project: Fiddlehead
Deadline: September 15, 2012
New words written: 1669 (it’s a start!)
Present total word count: 1669 words
So bearing that in mind, Mr Smith's kinda goes thus:
Things accomplished in fiction: rewrote chapter two of Turn the Lamp Down Low which brings me to a much better place than I was yesterday (in which I wondered why I was crucifying myself over something so small). I had to get to chapter seven of the book and then backtrack somewhat to get this right so it took a little longer than I really wanted to due to the amount of research involved. I say research, but creating a world from scratch and a magical ceremony that doesn't really exist that's weirder than what actually goes on in real life are not things that drip off my tongue easily. Actually, that's a lie - they drip off my tongue very easily. Putting them into sentences that other people want to look at is another matter entirely. Time to go forwards in time again now and hope I don't ever have to do that to myself again. (Dear other writers - is this normal?)
Things accomplished in real life: decided to rebrand the site here with the publishing company logo in the background (that's the Twin Earth sun/moon icon type thing that's suddenly appeared) and clean up some other scraps that were bugging me. Listened to the rest of Peter May's audiobook version of The Black House (which is very highly recommended from this quarter) whilst I took the wrappers off my page at about me. Not really necessary to make it live agan for any reason, but not doing any harm either. Next up - proofing the magazine and signing her off for print which will push me a good few hours into the evening. Then I had better get started on the next one - or at least have a clue as to what's going into it. Watched John Carter DVD that I stole off the kids this afternoon too. Good movie - don't believe what you hear on the grapevine, it's great fun. Note to self - remember to phone your mother... maybe. Is that enough for you?
Project: Turn The Lamp Down Low
Deadline: August 27th, 2012
New words written: 1,765
Present total word count: 7,342 words
I might have to rework the deadline on this. That date seems a bit close for the word count I was working towards but it might work out. Let's see where we are at the weekend. Just trying to keep focus on publishing in November as promised - to nobody but myself obviously, but still...
Stacked to the nines.
This week, I've pretty much punished myself at both ends of the candle putting out another magazine and clearing up on about 16,000 words in other writing. Around 10k of that was on Turn The Lamp Down Low (not including the words and the day I sacrificed twisting what was already completed on the first section from a first person narrative into third to make it work properly) - the other 6k was spent tightening up some other things I have on the boil here. Overall not a bad weeks work but I crashed and burned out last night and gave up trying to think my way through the fog and took Eleanor and the kids to see The Amazing Spiderman. I say 'took the kids' but as we all know, this is just deep cover for not having to go see a movie by yourself. Anyway, today, my goal was to crank it up again and put down a good 4,000 more on Lamp before the weekend took over but I have to admit I'm struggling - hence the blog post. Sometimes when I write these, it's to keep the machine moving. Quite often, while I'm typing out stuff on here, all the ideas slot into the right places while I'm not looking. And sometimes, you just have to sit back and look at the copious amounts of words you've written in the last few days and wonder how the hell you managed to make them all sound different from each other. In other news, started getting some good feedback this week over the initial copies of Black Dye, White Noise but am encouraging people to leave any feedback they have either at amazon or itunes rather than here. Sometime later in the month, which I haven't even looked at yet, I'm doing a DJ slot in a club for some promo that's related to something else but I think we might be able to squeeze in some BDWN action somewhere along the line. More on that when I come up for air. It's only a couple of weeks away so I guess I'd better get my game face on pretty soon.
Actually, there's quite a lot of news kicking about that I haven't thought about too hard. Biggest news of all is probably that some time in September, I'm headed out to Colorado on a mission. Not sure if there'll be time to do anything else other than work while I'm there, but it won't be for want of trying. More on that some other time, right now though, I think I shall hit the 'post' button on this, go offline and proof the mag before trying to muscle up the CMYK matter back on track...
Somebody get me a doctor
Remember when you were a kid and hearing some kinds of music blocked everything else and made life rock in a big way? This was one of mine: