It all began on Monday, by just feeling a bit "under the weather" - is that an old person's phrase? Tuesday was a little worse but yesterday I really had to make some considerable effort to be bothered with anything - including breathing.

I thought committing the cardinal sin (going to bed early) might help, so I hit the sofa at 11, and was still staring at the same spot on the wall four hours later, so that was a stupid idea. I haven't been ill for about 10 years... and I don't intend on going there now either but the damn thing won't leave me alone. It's got my throat and my chest, every muscle in my body aches and I'm tired but not tired at the same time... probably something to do with the amount of caffeine in those flu powder drinks (and the tea... and the coffee...).

At lunchtime today, I thought I would face it head on and dragged this sorry-ass zombie carcass out of bed to the supermarket in search of "high-end drugs". First port of call, NightNurse. The Destroyer. Maybe it's the idea of it that was planted in my head years ago but whenever I take it, I get about half an hour before I'm six feet under for the next twelve hours. Thus, it has to be a planned attack. I also invested in the excellent Chloraseptic throat spray because I feel like I've been doing one of those razor blade eating tricks, but that could have something to do with the smoking. You spray it at the back of your mouth and it goes numb. It doesn't last very long though, so it's a bit like legal cocaine in that it does the job.

I think I've slept on and off for an hour here, an hour there today but I only ended up feeling guilty that while I was lying there, I could actually have been doing something constructive - now I have come to the table to do something constructive, I find that I am very tired.

Some viruses are crafty bastards - Day 2 had better be the last day. Am on a road trip tomorrow until Sunday. Let's see how it likes being in a car with me for 6 hours at a time. I'm thinking that maybe some well placed audio delights might see it running for cover...

Currently reading: "Always read the instructions before taking" leaflets
Currently listening to: The sound of my own blood pumping in my ears